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We have recently gone through a major role reversal. Previously we were both working and Helen was doing about 95% of food prep, I was doing most of the washing/clean up. Now she has a serious job and I’m not working so it’s me doing 95% of food prep and all other house “work”.

This arrangement is obviously taking some adjustment time but the biggest thing has been to try to roll with the ups and downs. It is so easy to fall into the criticising role of “you’re not doing it how I do it” therefore it’s wrong. This is not a long-term strategy. It is much more constructive to bite your lip and say thank you. If something really is a problem then it must be dealt with, but in reality it’s seldom serious. Constructive criticism can be useful but too much of it risks becomming a nag.

With noisy demanding kids and a spouse that’s rarely around during the week days, so what if it takes me half an hour longer to prepare the evening meal? Learning from my own mistakes is a great way for me to improve and become more efficient.

A little patience and thanks goes a long way.

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